Cherries and Bananas - Dumping A Guy Because of a Small Penis...

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Vintage Friday

With just a hint of innocence

Come on over to the dark side occasionally and read my blog at http://www.lifecherries.com

Can Your Friend Come Play As Well?

I was thinking about the various fantasies that women have the other day and which ones are common to both men and women.  I don't know about all you ladies out there but have you seen the look on a man's face when you mention the term "Threesome".  It almost looks like their brains go into overdrive mode.

I must admit I don't really have much experience in this field but it is definitely one of my top 5 fantasies.  Turning your fantasy into reality could be a little complicated though.  I am not quite sure how one bring's up the possibility of a threesome with your significant other - do you just casually say "Can Your Friend Come Play As Well?"

Now I know most guys would probably be interested in the female / female / male (FFM) version of a threesome.  The guys I have spoken to about threesome's have all pulled their faces up at the thought of the male / male / female (MMF) version.  Apparently the thought of 2 naked guys touching creeps them out - especially when their "junk" is involved.

For me personally - I am not fussy.  I am more than happy to fantasize about either.
Imagine being seduced by 2 guys at once.  Men are naturally competitive - and just think about them both bringing their A game and competing to see who can give you the most pleasure.  I must admit I could easy succumb to the thought of a MMF threesome with a number of guys I know.

Although I have often imagined a FFM threesome, I have no girl on girl experience.  But that is not to say the thought has not crossed my mind (okay - maybe I have said too much here).

 Anyway......  Just picturing this scenario - do I choose a close girlfriend and then the two of us pick a guy to partake?  Or do me and my guy pick a girl we both like?  And how do we go about picking said girl?  I would not be able to pick anyone I know - certainly don't want any of my friends coming anywhere near my guy.  I would not approve of any of the girls he knows either - would make me extremely jealous of what would / could possibly result down the line with them or what has transpired between them in the past. So that leaves a stranger.  Where do you find a girl willing to partake who doesn't know either of you?  Do you ask around and go on word of mouth from other's or do you start looking in the back page of the newspaper in the XXX column?  (And let's not forget she has to be less attractive than I am.)

I managed to find some threesome tips and etiquette:

• Make each other feel comfortable (Set the mood and be accommodating)
• Let the women initiate the first step
• Make sure transitions between each other flow
• Don't favor one over the other
• Take turns
• Don't constantly try to please both at the same time (There is another person to help)
• Masturbate if you feel like it
• Don't force women (or guys) to do anything with each other
• Be into everything they suggest
• Respect each other's boundaries
• End it smoothly (Don't act weird)
• and most importantly - USE PROTECTION!

How about sharing some of your tips and experiences here if you have any!


 

Come on over to the dark side occasionally and read my blog at http://www.lifecherries.com

Tantalizing Tuesday

I  thought I would make my mark on this site and add a little sugar for the girls as well.  I do a weekly series called Tantalizing Tuesday on my blog and thought I would share it here.

So eat your hearts out guys!

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It is no secret that I have a little bit of a fetish for Harley's and one of my favorite TV shows is Sons of Anarchy.  And of course I go weak at the knees when I see Charlie Hunnam on a Harley.  We saw Pacific Rim over the weekend so I just had to showcase him on this weeks Tantalizing Tuesday edition.

Come on over to the dark side occasionally and read my blog at http://www.lifecherries.com

Cherries and Bananas - Exes on Facebook

My female friend’s boyfriend of 4 years recently received a friend request from an ex on Facebook.  He accepted, saying they were high school friends before they dated, and now he seems to be spending a lot of time talking with her.  He has been honest with his girlfriend and has not been trying to hide the fact that they are chatting.  He told her the other day that she wants to meet up with him to talk about some things that were left “unfinished.”  According to him, the breakup was kind of bad and he feels they both need “closure.”  He told my friend that she has nothing to worry about and they are going to meet up in a week or two (They now live about 2 hours apart.)  My friend is not the jealous type, but she is extremely bothered by all of this.  She asked me if I thought she would be out of line if she told forbid him to see her.  I think this is perfect for our Cherries and Banana’s series

Matt: Kiersten (My friend that is the subject of this post), you should win an award for the “Most Tolerant Girlfriend in the World!”  I don’t know of many women who would let their longtime boyfriend chat away for hours with an Ex – I know I wouldn’t want my GF to be talking to an ex-boyfriend for hours at a time.  Hell, most of my Girlfriends have gotten pissed off if I unconsciously whisper my exes name in my sleep, but that has only happened once or twice.  

Personally, I have never been in your boyfriend’s shoes.  I haven’t really had a lot of online connections with my exes.  Not sure if it is me or them, but I think I only have two as friends on Facebook and we really never talk. And both of them were my facebook friends before my currenty honey, so it wasn’t like I added them after we were dating.  Now, I have had some of my girlfriends add their exes and I have to admit, I didn’t like it. I don’t think they talked to the exes that often.  As a matter of fact, most of my exes were not super engrossed by Facebook, Twitter or any other Social Networking sites so I wasn’t that worried. 

So I can kind of relate and I understand what you are feeling.  Your boyfriend and this chick used to have a thing.  They have spent a lot of time together, know each other well and probably saw each other naked numerous times.  That is kind of where I draw the line…If you see each other naked then you have progressed past the “friends” stage.  So you have the right to be concerned. 

My advice to you Kiersten is that you should go to him and tell him you have a problem with this.  You have been together a long, long time and I know you both have talked about marriage, so you are well within your rights to tell him that you do not want them to meet.  Tell him everything and then see what happens.  If he ends up not meeting her, then that is a good sign that things are back to normal.  If he defriends her on facebook, even better.  Start planning the wedding.  But if he keeps chatting away with her and goes to meet her, then I would say it is pretty much over.  You poured your heart out and told him how you felt and he basically said “So What!  I am my Own Man and I am Gonna Do What I Want!”  If he does that, he is not marrying material.  I would end it and cut your losses.

There is one other option that could satisfy both of you…Ask if you can tag along with him to the meeting.  Supposedly, they are just going to have dinner or something, right?  You invite him out with your friends, tell him if they are just friends, then it should be no problem if you go with him.  If he lets you go along, then all should be well.  Hopefully that would put your mind at ease. 

Lanthie, I think she could probably use a woman’s point of view on this…

Lanthie: In case you guys hadn’t noticed, we are very complicated.  The short answer here is that Kiersten will be jealous – even though she is not the jealous type.

I have a good friend on Facebook and we share many secrets with each other.  She has been seeing (and sleeping with) a guy for quite a few months now and they have recently friended each other on FB.  He has loads of female friends on FB and it pains her whenever she sees one of these women comment or likes his status.   And she quietly dies inside when he responds.  She has no idea who any of them are – they may be colleagues from work or family or past acquaintances.  She often finds herself stalking some of these women to see if any of them have a history with her guy.   She has also been tempted to ask him who all these women are – it is not that he has given her any reason to mistrust him or anything, it is just that we are naturally curious and it gets the better of us.

I just love your analogy about seeing each other naked being the line in the sand.  (Lol – makes Cybesex good to go – unless you see naked pics of each other of course!)

I am not the jealous type either and if I were in her shoes, I would be just as curious / jealous.  If he feels they need some closure on their breakup, I’m sure he would be reluctant to agree to Kiersten tagging along to the meet.  It would be a little more than awkward talking about what once was in front of her.

I’m not quite sure I agree with her forbidding him to see her either.  I don’t believe that we should ever be forbidding our partners to do anything.  If they are truly in love with each other, she should be able to trust him.  Men think a little differently to women so I would love to say that he should be able to sense that she is not happy with the meet and possibly decline the meeting, but men don’t pick up on these sort of things.  It needs to be spelt out to them.  So she should definitely tell him how she feels about it all.  There is no substitute for communication. 

As far as him chatting to this chick over FB – well this is difficult to police in today’s world.  If they don’t chat over FB, there are 100’s of other ways for them to chat.  At least this way your friend is aware of the friendship and it is not being hidden.  Personally, I would be worried if he were hiding it from her.

Read other posts in the “Cherries and Bananas” series

 

Come on over to the dark side occasionally and read my blog at http://www.lifecherries.com

Vintage Friday

I run a Vintage Friday series on my blog which I thought I would share with all your guys as well.  Thought it may add a little spice to your day!

 

 

Polyamory (Lanthie's Compendium #8)

I was watching the latest episode of The Glades earlier today which featured "Polyamory".  Seeing as though the President of my Country (South Africa) practices Polyamory and is widely criticized for it,  I thought I would do some research with an open mind and expand on it.

Polyamory is an" alternative relationship" commonly referred to as an open marriage, non-monogamy, and polygamy. Each of these structures is different, but they all share the concept of being romantically linked with more than one person at the same time.

It is not the threesome scenario you guys are all picturing right now - yeah - that hot brunette giving the blond with big tits oral while you make yourself useful is not quite the same thing. (I was going to include a pic representing this image but thought Matt would not be too impressed with me if I did - so you will have to form your own mental image!)

This is an actual intimate long term relationship with more than one person at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.  It depends on the agreements reached between all parties as to who sleeps with who and when.

A relationship among three people is often called a triad or threesome;
among four people a quad or foursome.
Sometimes groupings of three or more are called moresomes.

In triads or threesomes, the relationships may be characterized as forming a triangle or a "V". i.e Picture a triangle with the points being refereed to as A (male), B (female) and C (male). B would typically be the hinge or pivot of the relationship. B has a sexual relationship with A and C, but never with them together. So they may agree that A and C get alternate days with B. Or their agreement may be one where A and C share B at the same time.

Other letters to describe the different scenario's are "N" or "U" for a foursome, or "W" for a fivesome ("Z" and "M" are equivalents to "N" and "W").

I am sure there are many pro's and con's to this lifestyle.   What are your thoughts?




Come on over to the dark side occasionally and read my blog at http://www.lifecherries.com

Is short hair sexy?

Matt, I came across an old post of yours that you did way back in 2012 titled: Free Advice Friday - Short Hair on Women.  This caught my eye as I am one of those women who has always had short hair.  So I have decided to give my take on it.

I always had beautiful long blond hair growing up but something made me cut my hair when I was about 18. And I have always sworn by short hair since then - I wash it every day and it dries in 2 minutes flat. Leaves me with more time to do other things and hubby always said he liked me with short hair. 

 I often considered growing it out but found it irritated me 6 months down the line and I would have it all cut off again.   I suited my lifestyle and I always thought it looked good on me.

But about 2 years I got fed up with how I looked and decided I needed a total make-over.  So I decided to grow my hair - just to see if I liked it. I was highly irritated with my hair and the first 6 months came and went. I stood by my decision to keep letting it grow.   Every time I went to my hairdresser he would cut off an inch or two and I would curse him.  He always said it encouraged growth and he also needed to get rid of all the layers (ok, I'm rambling now so I'll stop......)

So here I am 2 years down the line and I now have long hair again - and I absolutely love it.  It has made me see myself in a totally different light.  I feel so much sexier and I have the ability to wear my hair if different styles.  I can pin it up, I can put it in a ponytail, I can wear it lose etc.

But let's face it, I am the same person I was with short hair.  You can be and feel sexy with short or long hair.  It is all about how you see yourself and how you carry yourself.

So my advice to you all out there, is do whatever you feel happy and comfortable with.  Your opinion is the only one that counts.




Come on over to the dark side occasionally and read my blog at http://www.lifecherries.com